Archive: January 2007

How to take control of your life

In this second installment of "Just Plain Speak" find the right attitude to take charge

by Dr. Rodney Wilson

In the last issue, performance enhancing and illicit drugs were the some of the featured topics of discussion. I asked you “What are you dependent on and what are you going to do about it?”

If the last issue generated pauses for reflection or thought, and as this New Year begins, I ask you, “What is your drug of choice?”

There are times that people use alcohol and all type of drugs to run away from something. It could be something like The Unknown and The Future or The Pain. They are running away instead of running to.

Anxiety, Fear, Worry and Pain. High-Level Amateur and Professional Athletes state that they do not feel any of those emotions because it is counterproductive to performing well in their sport or endeavor. However, these individuals are like the rest of us, they are human. They DO feel fear, they do worry and they are anxious about things they can not control: The Unknown and The Future. In fact, many of them use these emotions in performing at the highest level. Nonetheless, if they state the obvious then they are perceived as being weak. In sports, as well as in life, being weak equates with being a loser. They worry about losing and gaining weight. They worry about not performing.

Many of us work in jobs where we have to appear to be strong. If we appear to be weak we may lose that account or worse yet we may be fired for poor performance. Many of use have life and family situations in which we must be seen as being strong. It’s the Rugged American Way. So we may turn to substances which will help us overcome.

Alcohol, marijuana, pain killers, tranquilizers and depressants (including Quaaludes) depress the senses and one may appear to be alleviated from pain, fear and worry. Caffeine, cocaine, LSD, amphetamines (including speed) and steroids heighten the senses and one may appear to be alleviated from pain, fear and worry. Please note: In either situation The Euphoria Does Not Last. After the euphoria dissipates, the following may happen: intense mental depression, confusion, lack of concentration, lack of coordination, fatigue, slurred speech, stopped breathing, poisoning, and in worst cases - death. The problems and situations that one is running away from have not gone away, well……. they’re still there.

It’s easy to state that this may have something to do with a lack of confidence, lack of belief in one’s ability or a lack of coping; however this has to do with just merely being human, either running away from something or peering into the future and not being able to control the outcome. In either case, there is a sense of not being in control. This may be simplistic reasoning for complex human situations but usually we resolve to change things when we feel that things are gotten out of control.

So why do we make New Year’s Resolutions when we know nothing is going to change?

On a personal level, I’m no different. I worry about not measuring up. I worry about that people may find or see that I am not as good as I think I am. I worry about being lazy. I worry about losing weight. I worry about not looking or being as fit as the next person or the next Adonis who I see in the weight room at the Y. I’m mentally prepared to reach my goals but I worry that my body will betray me in my attempts to achieve my goals. I worry about being stressed out.

I know I’m not alone.

I worry that I may not be accepted for my worth. I worry that I may not live up to my own expectations. I worry about NOT BEING GOOD ENOUGH. I worry about losing and gaining weight. I worry about making brand new New Year's Resolutions and new plans that will come and go as the cold and dark months of January and February fade in and my enthusiasm fades out. I WORRY ABOUT BEING A LOSER. I worry about being alone.

I know I’m not alone.

Do you feel me? Can you feel me? Do you have doubts?

Time does not wait for any of us, but time does give us an opportunity to be reborn.

I ask you, “Are you ready to do something, what ever that joyous something may be?”

High-Level Amateur and Professional Athletes do have it right. They embrace their anxieties and fears, then conquer them and then use them in order to achieve their goals.

Embracement of one’s anxieties and fears is the first step for success.

“Embracement” is (the majority of) the healthy athletes’ true drug of choice despite what you may read or hear about alcohol, marijuana, cocaine and steroid use. Alcohol, marijuana, cocaine and steroid use is not a high-level athlete problem, it’s a societal disease and until it’s eradicated from society it will not be eradicated from sports. In the end, we are all products of our environment.

On a personal level, I’m changing my attitude. I’m not going to worry about my weight or worry about looking into the mirror, into the abyss. I’m not going to worry about the next magic drink or pill (as seen on TV) which will give me energy or give me “the will to do.” I’m not going to worry about being validated by others. I will validate and embrace my flaws and fear and use them to achieve my goals and if I fail, well I failed, but I tried. I will not be stagnant and I know that I’m not alone.

Figuratively and literally, this year I am running to The Unknown and The Future. My new year’s resolution is to embrace the unknown and the future and run to getting high on life. I can not control the unknown and the future but I will embrace my Anxieties, my Fears, my Worries, and my Pain and I will run to get high on life. This “running to” is not about running, it’s about attitude. It’s about how I use my fullest abilities to approach my day, my efforts, my work, my activities, my sports and my family. I can control me.

Do you feel me? Can you feel me? Are you going to do the same thing, if not already?

I know I’m not alone.

My drug of choice is……….

My drug of choice is to breathe and live and play. There’s something about feeling the wind go through my hair (what little I have of it) while being fully involved and invested in an exercise or sport. There’s something about feeling cleansed after hard work with sweat pouring off of me, or my brain finally solving a problem. There something spiritual about completing a task to fullest of my abilities without second guessing my efforts. This will be my drug of choice.

My New Year’s Resolution is just to be me, FLAWED and yet as STRONG as I can be. I’m running to that as fast as I can. What is your New Year’s Resolution?

What will be your drug of choice? Are you ready to “run to” something?

Do you feel me? Can you feel me?

I know I’m not alone.

Dr. Rodney Wilson is a sports psychologist, and has helped several area athletes to greatness with his valuable insights. Plus he’s quite an athlete himself.