The gym is a great place — if you can just get past the locker room

11/17/09 Posted in Cover Story News  |  1 Comment

The locker room at the local gym is a place of wonder. There are so many bizarre things that occur and exist within the locker room; I wonder sometimes what I’ve gotten myself into. I hear constantly that people forgo the gym because they’re worried about the macho atmosphere, looking silly in front of other because the clothes aren’t high-tech, or even athletic, or just don’t want to have to change clothes from work to workout in.

After seeing a couple of years of locker room dwellers, I can confirm that it’s a bit unusual to undress with all the different personalities around you. You should by all means join a gym if you want to get healthy, get fit, and live that healthy lifestyle because it’s all about you. It’s worth it. But be warned, there are some characters. I’ve narrowed it down to three types. If you think of more, I’d love to hear about them. Visit the Healthy & Fit Magazines’ Facebook page and drop me a note. Here are my three types of people to pay attention to in the gym locker room. My experience, however, is limited to the men’s locker room.

Through countless interviews with the fairer sex, I think it’s pretty much the same in the women’s locker room. I’d also like to say I don’t sit in the locker room and look for these people. I’m the first to admit I like being a people watcher—but not in a locker room.

These guys are just that obvious (and obnoxious).

1. The naked guys. These are the guys you notice first because, well, they’re naked. We’re all naked at sometime in the locker room, which of course is the point of having a room to change in before working out, but these guys take it beyond the norm. They’re naked by the locker. They’re naked reading the paper in whatever chair is handy. They’re naked watching TV. They’re just naked all the time! I don’t get these guys. I’ve seen naked guys talking to other naked guys. I don’t know about you dear reader, but I like to get in the locker room, change, get to the workout and get on with my day. For the naked guys, I think this is the best time of the day—being naked.
2. The talkers. These guys don’t shut up. It’s that simple. I’ve witnessed guys come into the locker room talking about a subject, change while talking about a subject and leave the locker. Because most workouts are an hour, I leave too, and when I finished, I went into the locker room and these guys were still on the same subject and hour later. They got undressed, showered (in different stalls) and got dressed in their work clothes while carrying on a conversation. Loudly. For everyone to hear. Really? It’s that important?
3. The messy guy. I try to find the most private spot that I can and that’s often harder than it sounds. I claim a locker in a place where it looks like no one else has done it. When I change, I create a small pile, change and get moving. It never ceases to amaze me at the guy who will just leave his bag on the bench, take up a whole row of lockers by throwing socks, towels, underwear—you name it—around. I don’t want to touch that stuff! Clean up your mess! Now you made me sound like my mom! Arrrghhh!

Those are the three most common guys I see around me. The best part is that they don’t really pay attention to anyone but themselves, so if you’re in there, you’re safe. It’s kind of funny picking them out once they’re labeled. The gym is a great place to start a healthy lifestyle, and I bet if you met these guys in the gym, outside of the locker room, they’d be great. In the locker room, definitely stay focused on getting changed.

Unless you can change with your eyes closed. I might have to try that.

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by Tim Kissman. Publisher Healthy & Fit Magazine