Confirmation

9/29/08 Posted in Kettlebell Crazy  |  0 Comments

At the community service center behind our church, early Sunday mornings are dedicated to an exercise class.  Our usual leader has taken the past few weeks off to run in some local races–she’s a veteran marathoner and avid advocate of all things running.  In her absence, she’s left me in charge. (Big smile here….)

Now, I’ve got nothing against running per se, and nothing against marathoners as persons–I’ve got over a dozen marathons to my own dubious credit; and I still run, a little bit, just to stretch my legs.  But as to another marathon?  Well, I should never say never….but in this case, I take exception.  (I’ll save my reasons for a future column).

These pre-dawn Sunday a.m.’s have found me lugging my inventory of kettlebells to the back seat of my little red Corolla:  a little red 15-pounder; blue 20-pounder; the austere black 12,16,24 kg-ers.; and bargain black 35,50, and 70-pounders.

As our little flock entered on that first session (there was only  two of them, not counting my wife and me), they hadn’t  expected to find eight suitcase-handled cannonballs of various caliber facing them sullenly from their line-up at the front of the classroom (rather like a bunch of bad dudes in a Veggie Tales music video).  Their eyes grew a bit wide as I explained to them what we were going to do that day: four sets of ten two-handed swings; and the Turkish get-up.  But they stayed with me as I demonstrated the movements, and Val, my, wife filled in the blanks with additional commentary–which is why she’s such a good teacher!

Now it was their turn.  One of our participants, Carmen, took up the 12 kg., with my wife’s urging, –”You’ll be surprised how much weight you can move with the swing,” Val told her.  In fact, what _really_ surprised her was how much the weight’s momentum could move _her_!

“Whoa!”  Carmen hollered.  ”This is too heavy.”  She retreated to the blue 20-pounder, for the remainder of the session.

We completed our reps and sets and headed out to the track at Waverly High School to do laps.  An inauspicious beginning, I thought.  Still, it had made an impression.

“This, I can do,” said Snowrene, who was our other “victim” that morning.  ”I could really feel it in my muscles today.”

Since the size and consistency of participation was spotty and irregular, the drill varied little from week to week.  This was an introduction to the kettlebell, so it was important to keep it simple and non-threatening.
Even though a few were skeptical at first, there’s something irresistible about a weight with its handle sticking right up at you from its very top–almost daring you to take hold of it.  Our pastor, who’d suffered a herniated disk less than a year ago, was swinging a 35-pounder along with the rest of us–even hefted the 70-pounder a time or two!  Several who had been accustomed to high reps with low weights, machines, and isolation of individual muscle groups, were amazed that a couple of very basic drills could work them over so thoroughly in less than half an hour!

But Carmen was our most faithful pupil.  She’d slimmed down over the past year or so with diet and running, and now was looking for something to strengthen and tone her muscles.  Last week we rewarded her for her perfect attendance–and for being our only attendee that day–by taking her through an intense five-minute circuit of swings and pushups–one of Josh Hillis’ fat-burners:

Two-handed swings
pushups
swings
pushups
swings

Each set done back to back without a break.

Carmen whimsically selected the cherry red 15-pound bell, because, she laughed, that it matched her singlet and ball cap–even though I thought it was a little wimpy.  Evidently she came to think so, too:  this morning, for our final session–a minute of 2-handed swings, 5 crunch presses, and 1-hand swings left and right–she went for the 20-pounder.

“I’ve graduated!”  she chirped.

I’m proud of that kid!